We saw you for the last time in my tummy today. We didn’t really get a good look at your face, you were determined to hold your arm and hand across your face in what was a very melodramatic pose. Clearly you are one of us. The radiologist has estimated that you already weigh about 3.9kg, your side profile revealed lovely chubby cheeks!
It is time for you to leave, to come out into the wider world. You’ve grown big enough and there are so many people waiting, waiting, waiting to meet you. For my part I am filled with ambivalence, I love having you all to myself, to know you so intimately inside me. To feel you dance, squirm, wiggle within me. To rub my hands across my round pregnant belly. You will be my youngest child, this will be the last time I will be pregnant and there is a very big part of me that just doesn’t want it to end.
… but it must. The time has come.
I’m scared. Having laboured and birthed three times previously I am left knowing all too well what I am in for. Even so I am determined to bring you into this world safely, I’ve been working hard to do everything in my power to get my body ready for another VBAC.
We’re going to be just fine my dearest babe. It is time for us to gaze into each other’s eyes. It is time for us to smell each other, to nestle and hug.
See you soon,